The Perfect Job

Today my horoscope said the following.

An unexpected communication may come today from someone connected with your career. This is good news, but it may be so off-the-wall that you might walk around in a daze for a while, trying to make sense of it all. Don't agonize too much! Whatever it is that's suddenly coming to you, you've worked hard for it, and you deserve it! Think of it as a karmic reward if you like! Take a friend out to celebrate. Enjoy your day.

Well, I have to report the communications today were interesting.

I did have communications today, long communications, and connected to my career for at least some of the conversation, though I am not too sure there was anything unexpected. I am pretty confident that the good news coming my way is subliminally hidden somewhere and that the conversations that erupted and developed today in relation to work, hold a little key that one day we can retrospectively return to, and say, “Ah, yes!”

So in anticipation of the awaiting career development, I have spent the evening fine-tuning some more writing, capturing some more ideas and thinking, thinking and thinking. And I have finally come up with an idea.

It is time for me to write a job description for Zenpuss that captures all the elements that I enjoy so much, all the things that I would like to have in my perfect career, working for myself, in partnership with others. And we must all remember that Zenpuss is only one part of my being, but this JD is going to concentrate on her particular area of expertise.

Job title: Zenpuss: creative thinker and writer

Location: Anywhere where there is a computer to write on, a bed to lie on and plenty of working implements to stimulation the creative juices

Salary: Millions of pounds, earned by people enjoying the writing of a sexually active, contented woman

The main purpose of the job: The main purpose of the job is philanthropic in nature. The applicant should have a fundamental desire to enable people to pursue their sexual journey to enlightenment through quality sexual and sensual writing that makes them want to clutch their cocks or push their hands in their pussies. The applicant should have a vivid imagination and a willingness to share her sexual experiences and ideas with a wide audience of hungry readers. The applicant should be prepared for further learning and should willingly describe on regular occasions how fucking horny she is, with no exaggeration or pretence, because the reader will know!

Person specification: The applicant should

1. Be a sexy woman with an active imagination, purposely employed to entice orgasms

2. Write daily of horny things or interpretations on sexuality with a view to informing a naïve and frustrated population of the joys of sex

3. Be prepared to try any sexual activity, within her comfort zone, in order to further her knowledge and experience of the subject matter

4. Understand the needs of others by employing tact and diplomacy in her writing

5. Be able to write

6. Be willing to work evenings, mornings, at moments of extreme horniness

7. Be prepared to wank regularly as part of the ongoing development of her sexiness with a variety of sex toys; all shapes and sizes

8. Participate in seriously horny pornographic research, looking at many photographs and dvds of hot, horny men and women, gushing spunk over one another, fucking each other with hard cocks and dribbling fannies in order to inform readers of the journey on which they are set

9. Have regular sex with a man who fills her cunt perfectly, ensuring that she has regular reminders of her own cums in order to inform other women about the need to spunk hot juices

10. Be able to give fellatio, sensual snogs and take cunnilingus for same purpose as above

11. Know how to ask for sex in a positive and forthright way, unashamedly admitting to her avaricious needs

12. Be prepared to talk to literary agents about the style of her writing without any embarrassment, for it is a perfectly natural thing to write about.

13. Understand sexual politics and be clear and concise in her continued pursuit of righting the very many wrongs about sexuality in this country.

14. Learn how to fist herself whilst also allowing her sexual partner to fist her into an extreme fuckable state

15. Be prepared to take and participate in a range of media activities including photography and dvds shots of her having sex, wanking or just spreading her legs and opening her cum hole just for the hell of it.

Knowledge: The applicant should have a knowledge of how to excite, with clear references provided by at least one lover in ability to stimulate and arouse. The applicant needs to be sexually active, outlining precisely what form the various sexual activities each week are. The applicant should be beginning to understand her own sexuality to inform others.

Skills: As determined within the person specification, the applicant must know her way around a man’s and a woman’s body, with clear skills in bringing on orgasms. She also needs a basic skill I writing semi-erotic and sexual political writing. Photography skills are desired as is a skill to pose happily for cunt shots.

Experience: The applicant should have a reasonable and up to date experience of mind-blowing sex. She should have experience of a range of sexual activities that inform her writing. She needs to have experience of ongoing fucking good sex; average and consistent sex is not enough. This applicant should have experience of sex that is in the upper echelons of experience and that this sex can be maintained throughout her time in the job. The applicant should have experience of driving her fingers into another woman’s cunt at the same time as giving a man a decent blow job. She should have experience of cumming at regular intervals. Please note that this will be tested during the interview process. The applicant should have a experience of exciting people through different media with experience of and an ability to stimulate a sexual partner even if he is hundred of miles away from her pussy.

Other issues: The applicant should have some unfulfilled sexual desires that she is prepared to carry out within the first six months in the job. She should work on finding an al fresco environment where her sexual partner can get his dick out in the comfort of being undiscovered by others so that she can be stimulated by his deep penetration in order to squirt all over the grass or beach or deserted street as nature intended.

The applicant should be prepared to learn more, ably supported by someone willing to guide and teach her about her own sexuality and the needs of others.

Final determinant: On reading this JD, the applicant should have a protruding labia that is dying to be touched. She should dive into her bedroom and fuck herself till she cums, plying the folds of her inner skin with gentle and yet forceful stimulation to produce oozles of juices. The reader of the JD should also have an arousing effect. Inability to produce a hard on will negate the applicant from applying.

Possibly to be continued or refined by colleague hoping for applicant to cum and apply